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I stood there for a long time, my hand shaking on the canister. The adrenaline hit me late, a sickening wave of nausea. I wasn't a conqueror. I wasn't a sportsman. I was just a guest who had barely avoided eviction.

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I walked back to camp, shoulders hunched. The mountain didn't care if I lived or died. It was indifferent to my tragedy or my triumph. And in that indifference, I found a terrible, beautiful peace. I stood there for a long time, my

Outside Inc. (which now owns Backpacker , Climbing , and SKI magazines) has consolidated its digital presence. The official (available for iOS and Android, and via desktop web browser at Outside Online) is the primary distribution channel. I wasn't a sportsman